Gay, lesbian, transgender, or queer. No matter what you identify as there are many options available to you to have a baby.
Granted, having a baby may not be as easy for you and your partner as it is for other couples, but with a little bit of help from the scientific community having a family is possible. And yes, you can even share your DNA with your offspring.
There has never been a better time for a gay couple to have a family. In fact, between 2 and 3 million kids have at least one parent who is part of the LGTBQ community. So we say go for it! You can become the gay fathers you’ve always wanted to be. And you can count on us to support you every step of the way.
Options for Gay Couples
Let’s have a quick lesson in biology: To have a baby, you must have sperm (from a man) and an egg (from a woman). I know you already know this but stay with me.
If you’re in a same-sex relationship, you’re missing one of the crucial pieces. This means you’ll need a third party to step in. We call this third-party reproduction assistance.
To solve that, you’ll need to do at least one of the following:
Insemination with a sperm donor: for lesbians
IVF with an egg donor: for gay men
Surrogacy: for gay men
Reciprocal IVF: for lesbians where one partner carries the baby and the other is the egg donor
Co-parenting: a planned, platonic relationship
Through these avenues, the possibility of you and your partner having a child that shares your DNA becomes a reality.
Third-Party Reproduction Assistance For Gay Mothers
For lesbian couples, third-party reproduction assistance is relatively straight forward. All you need to do it find a sperm donor, then go through a process called artificial insemination. Because women have eggs and can carry the baby, it is a pretty simple procedure.
Third-Party Reproduction Assistance For Gay Fathers
For male gay couples, it is much more complicated. For gay men to have babies, they’ll need to find an egg donor and a surrogate to carry the baby.
That’s where we come in. We are an agency who has committed their time and resources to help gay couples find the perfect egg donor. We have been through the process ourselves; we understand the journey. So we are taking our experiences and using them to help other couples become parents.
Egg Donation 101
If you are a gay couple looking into egg donation, here is a basic rundown of how the process works. This is the most common way for same-sex couples to become gay fathers.
Find an Agency
The first step is finding a reputable agency. Preferable one that understands the ins and outs of the IVF process and who sincerely wants what is best for the intended parents.
Also, make sure the agency is duly accredited by the SEEDS Union of Ethics and The American Society for Reproduction Medicine. There are are many agencies out there who do not hold themselves to high ethical standards when it comes to egg donation.
Make a Match
Once you have chosen an agency, you will be given access to their donor database. These donors have been screened, and are ready to be matched with intended parents.
You can be assured that only the best of the best pass the screening process.
Set Up an Agreement
Because of the nature of third-party reproduction assistance, there need to be some legal contracts set up to protect all parties involved.
These issues include:
The egg donor voluntarily relinquishes all rights to the eggs.
The egg donor has no parental responsibility on any children created using those eggs.
The egg donor has no obligations over the child if the baby is born with any sort of birth defects.
The timeline of how and when the eggs will be retrieved
How the intended parents will pay for any necessary travel expenses
If and how any medical costs will be covered
Any fees for canceled cycles
And the level of contact between the donor and the intended parents.
In Vitro Fertilization
Next comes the IVF process. This is when the eggs are harvested from a woman’s ovaries, put together with the sperm, and if all goes well, you’ll get a few embryos.
One or two of the healthiest embryos are then transferred to a surrogate who will carry the baby for nine months.
Any extra embryos can be cryopreserved for the future.
The cost of finding an egg donor and going through the IVF process can be expensive. Realistically, you can expect to spend anywhere between $18,000 to $30,000. But don’t let that stop you.
There are nonprofit organizations out there to help you get the funding you need.
Same-Sex Couples Can Have a Biological Family Too
Because of advanced scientific techniques, it is possible for gay couples to have babies that share their genes.
So go ahead, fill out a registration form then start thinking of baby names. We’re going to help you get the family you’ve always wanted. We can’t wait to start working with you.