How to Work with a Surrogate

Working with a surrogate can be a challenging and emotional experience. It is a decision that should not be taken lightly and requires careful consideration and preparation. Surrogacy is a journey that involves a lot of trust, communication, and collaboration between intended parents and surrogates. In this article, we will discuss how to work with a surrogate and ensure a successful surrogacy experience.

Choose the right surrogate

Choosing the right surrogate is the first and most important step in working with a surrogate. Intended parents should work with a reputable agency that has experience in surrogacy and can provide them with a candidate that meets their criteria. It is important to choose a surrogate who shares similar values, beliefs, and expectations as the intended parents. It is also important to choose a surrogate who has gone through medical review and psychological screenings to ensure that she is physically and emotionally capable of carrying a child.

Establish clear expectations and boundaries

Before starting the surrogacy process, intended parents and surrogates should establish clear expectations and boundaries. This includes discussing how often they will communicate, what kind of communication they will have, and what the intended parents’ involvement in the pregnancy will be. It is important to establish these expectations and boundaries to avoid misunderstandings and conflicts down the road.

Communicate regularly

Communication is key to a successful surrogacy experience. Intended parents and surrogates should communicate regularly throughout the surrogacy journey. This includes discussing the progress of the pregnancy, any medical issues that arise, and the completion of a birth plan. Regular communication helps build trust and ensures that everyone is on the same page.

Respect each other’s boundaries

It is important for intended parents and surrogates to respect each other’s boundaries. Surrogates are not employees of the intended parents and should never be treated as such.  Setting boundaries at the onset should be discussed so that all parties can set expectations.

Celebrate milestones together

Surrogacy can be a long and emotional journey. It is important to celebrate milestones together, such as the first ultrasound or the anatomy scan of the child. Celebrating these milestones together helps build a strong relationship between intended parents and surrogates and makes the surrogacy experience more memorable and enjoyable.

Have a surrogacy agreement in place

Before an embryo transfer, intended parents and surrogates should have a surrogacy agreement in place, commonly referred to as a Gestational Surrogacy Agreement, or GSA. This agreement should outline the terms and conditions of the surrogacy process, including compensation, medical expenses, and any complications that may arise. Having a surrogacy agreement in place helps protect everyone involved and ensures that everyone is on the same page.

Working with a surrogate is a complex and emotional process. It requires a lot of trust, communication, and collaboration between intended parents and surrogates. By choosing the right surrogate, establishing clear expectations and boundaries, communicating regularly, respecting each other’s boundaries, celebrating milestones together, and having a surrogacy agreement in place, intended parents and surrogates can ensure a successful and enjoyable surrogacy experience.  If you are interested in working with a surrogacy, let Elevate help you find your perfect match.  Learn more HERE.